Chapter 7: Sexual Behavior

>>Available in PDF

About this chapter
Sex is fundamentally about pleasure, yet this aspect is often neglected by sexuality education programs. Educators need to be careful not to fall into the trap of teaching adolescents only about the risks and potentially harmful consequences of intercourse or giving indirect or vague information. Many children grow up receiving contradictory messages about sex; they want—and need—clear, honest answers. Many participants will have questions about human sexual response and pleasure. For instance, young people and even adults wonder if women have orgasms, if it’s okay to masturbate, how to give pleasure to their partner, or how to know if their partner has had an orgasm. Myths abound. Addressing adolescents’ curiosity will help them to understand their own bodies, make better decisions, and ease future communication with partners about their sexual desires.

Masturbation is particularly important to address because it is one of the most common, if not the most common, of all human sexual behaviors, yet it is surrounded by misinformation and taboo. Many teenagers, girls as well as boys, will begin to masturbate during adolescence but may feel distressed about it because of negative and threatening messages that they have received. Such messages usually do not make people stop masturbating; they only make them worry about it. It should be made clear that despite controversy, masturbation is in no way harmful, and in the age of HIV/AIDS, it is clearly a safe alternative to unprotected intercourse. Furthermore, it can help people get to know their bodies and sexual responses.

For women in particular, sexual pleasure in relationships often does not come automatically. Expectations and reality often collide and cause disappointment or bewilderment. Teaching about the variety of ways to experience sexual pleasure, including similarities and differences between men and women, and encouraging communication between sexual partners can increase the likelihood that both partners will enjoy their sexual lives. In many societies, sexual behavior is overly focused on intercourse. Encouraging people to learn the many sources of sexual satisfaction and different kinds of lovemaking not only offers adolescents alternatives to sexual intercourse but can also decrease the likelihood of sexual problems in adulthood.